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Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 111 #150617

sci-fried-eggs-logoThis week the Sci-Fried Eggs broadcast from Studio B at Bathurst Manor.  The Eggs start by discussing the Lifetime Achievement Award of Tim Curry.  Then Chuck reviews Windows 10.  The Eggs bring you an interview from X-Con with Star Trek Voyager‘s Tim Russ.  Chuck dishes up a new edition of Crap Chuck Found on the Internet.  And the Eggs do a HeroesCon warmup with artist John Hairston Jr.

Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 111 – Click to Listen or Download

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 111, Segment 1
Tim Curry’s Lifetime Achievement Award

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 111, Segment 2
Chuck Reviews Windows 10

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 111, Segment 3
Tim Russ from X-Con

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 111, Segment 4
Crap Chuck Found on the Internet #11

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 111, Segment 5
HeroesCon Warmup: John Hairston Jr.


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Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 104 #150429

sci-fried-eggs-logoThis week 5 Minute Delay Radio brings you a rebroadcast of the Sci-Fried Eggs while their fate is decided.  In this rebroadcast the Sci-Fried Eggs broadcast from Crystal Coast Con in Cape Carteret, North Carolina.  The Eggs start by chatting with Twilight actor Rick Mora.  Then the beautiful horror actress Barbara Nedeljakova stops by.  The Eggs have a blast with some more of The Walking Dead cast, Michael Koske and Dango Nguyen.  And finally, the wonderful Marina Sirtis, Counselor Deanna Troi from Star Trek: The Next Generation, spends a couple segments with the Eggs and answers The Half Dozen!


Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 104 – Click to Listen or Download

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 104, Segment 1
Rebroadcast: Rick Mora

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 104, Segment 2
Rebroadcast: Barbara Nedeljakova

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 104, Segment 3
Rebroadcast: Michael Koske and Danjo Nguyen

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 104, Segment 4
Rebroadcast: Marina Sirtis Part 1

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 104, Segment 5
Rebroadcast: Marina Sirtis Part 2


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Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 102 #150415

sci-fried-eggs-logoThis week 5 Minute Delay Radio brings you a rebroadcast of the Sci-Fried Eggs while their fate is decided.  In this rebroadcast The Sci-Fried Eggs broadcast live from XCon World VI in Myrtle Beach, SC!  Doc and Chuck discuss Star Trek Into Darkness and get into a heated discussion over the new Klingons.  Special guest Camden Toy of Buffy and Angel fame visits.  Doc and Chuck are entranced by the beautiful Tiger Roxx and Jenn Martin of Purrrlesque Burlesque.  Then IronE Singleton, T-Dog of The Walking Dead, stops by the broadcast.  And the man who has been to every XCon, Ren and Stimpy creator Bob Camp sits down with the Sci-Fried Eggs.  And somewhere in the show, Michael Rooker, Merle from The Walking Dead, shows up and tells us whether people still try to give him chocolate covered pretzels!


Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 102 – Click to Listen or Download

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 102, Segment 1
Rebroadcast: Star Trek Into Darkness Review

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 102, Segment 2
Rebroadcast: Camden Toy

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 102, Segment 3
Rebroadcast: Purrrlesque: Tiger Roxx and Jenn Martin

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 102, Segment 4
Rebroadcast: IronE Singleton

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 102, Segment 5
Rebroadcast: Bob Camp with Special Guest Michael Rooker


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Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 91 #150128

sci-fried-eggs-logoThis week the Sci-Fried Eggs broadcast from the Technology Annex of Bathurst Manor.  The Eggs give their take on the Marvel Universe ending.  Then then Eggs discuss photographers vs. cosplayers and who should be able to charge for photos.  Simon Pegg is the new writer for Star Trek 3, so the Eggs dig out the What If Machine from their archives.  Doc has a new Documentary Corner.  And then the Eggs come up with some six word sci-fi stories!

Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 91 – Click to Listen or Download

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 91, Segment 1
The Marvel Universe is Ending

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 91, Segment 2
Photographers vs. Cosplayers: Who Should Charge Who?

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 91, Segment 3
Star Trek’s New Writer Simon Pegg/What If Machine: Star Trek Directors

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 91, Segment 4
Doc’s Documentary Corner: Aliens on the Moon: The Truth Exposed

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 91, Segment 5
Six-Word Sci-fi Stories

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Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 86 #141224

sci-fried-eggs-logoThis week the Sci-Fried Eggs bring you a Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs for the Holidays!  The Eggs dig in the archives for some of their favorite games including Movie Before and Afters, the What If Machine, a Christmas Edition of Crap Chuck Found on the Internet, the Greatest Fan Film Ever, and Blind Movie Synopsis.

Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 86 – Click to Listen or Download

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 86, Segment 1
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: Media Before and Afters

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 86, Segment 2
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: What If Machine: Star Trek Directors

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 86, Segment 3
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: Crap Chuck Found on the Internet #6: Christmas Edition

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 86, Segment 4
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: The Greatest Fan Film Ever

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 86, Segment 5
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: Blind Movie Synopsis: Rare Exports, 20th Century Boys, and A Town Called Panic

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Jobs I Think I’d Be Really Great At

Now most people will list my greatest quality as my hair.  But a close second would have to be my modesty.  And being modest means I have to admit that any job I would take I would be great at.  However, there are some jobs I think I’d be really great at.  What are the jobs that I would be really great at?  Well, I’m glad you freakin’ asked!

Mall Kiosk Attendant – Being my own boss is at the top of my list of job requirements right after great pay, benefits, dental, vision, a great snack room, free coffee, and an eleven-hour work week.  And I’ve also always said that if you want anything done right, you might as well do it yourself.  So being a mall kiosk attendant is the best of both worlds.  I’m my own boss and my own employee, which also means I’m simultaneously my favorite boss and employee, so that’s a bonus win-win.  I get to keep up with my own inventory.  I get to interact with people at my leisure.  And there are always a lot of hot girls with little-to-no supervision at the mall, which, in the pickup artist biz, is what they call a “target rich environment.”  So I’d have that going for me.

Toll Booth Operator – Being a toll booth operator shares a lot of the same advantages that being a mall kiosk attendant has.  And I do like working in quaint and close quarters  (the school I used to work at literally set my office up in a utility closet.  No joke, the height of my office was greater than the sum of its length and width.  It was like working in an elevator shaft).  The shorter the interaction with people I have, the better I like it, so taking money or making change to someone who doesn’t even want to stop at my booth to begin with means I’ll be great at moving people along.  I should also mention I’m wicked efficient at repetitive tasks.

Tour Guide – I know a lot of stuff about a lot of places.  And I love to tell people about that stuff.  Not to mention I’m one hell of a leader.  And I look good in a variety of period style hats.  I think tour guide is a slam dunk.  Not to mention that it would get me out of the house.  Historic residence, classic car garage, Civil War battle site, house of wax, Smithsonian, origami museum, I could pretty much handle anything that a tour could throw at me.  And if I happen to end up as some sort of jungle tour guide, I’m well prepared.  I’ve seen Romancing the Stone probably 30 times and I’ve seen Jewel of the Nile twice.  Like I said, slam dunk.

Beauty Pageant Judge – One of the many talents (along with modesty) that I was gifted with is the fervent desire to look at beautiful women and judge them based on a series of competitions focused primarily on superficial criteria.   This is also why I apathetically excel at judging costume contests.  It’s also the reason why Doctor Who never wins a costume contest that I judge.  It’s mostly because I don’t understand Doctor Who and how can I, in good conscience, choose something that I don’t understand?  It’s a rhetorical question, Doctor Who fans.  Don’t try to explain it to me.  And granted, I don’t understand what goes on in Utah, but I can sure tell if a girl from Utah is prettier and answers questions better than 49 other girls.  Actually, now that I think about it, a sexy girl Doctor Who would probably stand a good chance in a costume contest that I’m judging.  Food for thought, Whovians.

Starship Captain – I’m not sure if this is a real job yet, but as soon as it becomes one, I should be on the list of first people to captain a starship.  If there should be anyone responsible for 600,000 metric tons of metal cruising through space exploring planets and romancing beautiful alien women, it should be me.  I’ve seen every episode of Star Trek twice now.  And as long as Netflix keeps them up and I have any shred of free time, I’ll will have seen them all three times by the time this becomes a real job (unless it already is, in which case two times is gonna have to cut it).  I’ve also seen Starship Troopers, Star Wars, and Galaxy Quest, so I’m pretty sure I’ve got Starship Captainry down.  Not to mention that I’m well-liked and I have great hair (and don’t forget my modesty).

Lounge Singer – I’m not that great of a singer, but no one can argue that I’m a very passionate singer.  That makes me perfect for singing in a lounge with drunk people who don’t particularly care about quality so much as they do showmanship.  Not to mention, I look great in a suit.  I will have to find someone who plays a piano because I don’t play the piano very well that great at all.

State Representative – How hard can this job be?  Seriously, I watch a fair amount of C-SPAN and it seems like all you need to be a state representative is a decent suit and the desire to sit in a fancy room and listen to other people talk about stuff only they care about.  I do that all the time now, and my suits are far better than decent.  So I might as well get paid well and get great benefits for all my trouble.

That’s just a start.  I’m sure there are thousands more jobs I’d be really well-suited for.  But my modesty will only permit me to list so many at a time.


Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 76 #141015

sci-fried-eggs-logoThis week the Sci-Fried Eggs broadcast from the Restoration Room of the Site C Compound.  Doc and Chuck give their picks for the Ghostbusters all female cast.  Doc has another episode of Doc’s Documentary Corner and tackles Bigfoot: The Definitive Guide.  The Eggs bring you a double shot Crystal Coast Con Warmup interview with Marina Sirtis.  And the Eggs talk about physical media in a non-physical age!

Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 76 – Click to Listen or Download

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 76, Segment 1
Ghostbusters 3 Female Casting

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 76, Segment 2
Doc’s Documentary Corner: Bigfoot: The Definitive Guide

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 76, Segment 3
Crystal Coast Con Warmup: Marina Sirtis Interview Part 1

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 76, Segment 4
Crystal Coast Con Warmup: Marina Sirtis Interview Part 2

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 76, Segment 5
Physical Media in a Non-Physical Age

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Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 75 #141008

sci-fried-eggs-logoThis week the Sci-Fried Eggs are on the road broadcasting from the Bathurst Manor Radio Production Unit Truck from Supah Pop in Columbia, SC!  The Eggs start by talking about rumors of William Shatner in the next Star Trek movie.  Then the Eggs talk about new fall television shows and the return of Lost.  The Eggs salute the return of The Walking Dead and season 4 of the show on Netflix with an interview with Iron-E Singleton.  Chuck has a special edition of Crap Chuck Found on the Internet.  And finally, for the month of October, the Eggs talk about some of their favorite horror films!

Sci-Fried Eggs Episode 75 – Click to Listen or Download

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 75, Segment 1
William Shatner in Star Trek 3

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 75, Segment 2
New Shows and Lost News

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 75, Segment 3
Walking Dead Rewind: Iron-E Singleton Interview

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 75, Segment 4
Crap Chuck Found on the Internet #6: Christmas Edition

Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 75, Segment 5
Our Favorite Horror Movies

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An Open Letter to Captain Katherine Janeway

Dear Captain Janeway,

Well, when you got us stranded out here in the Delta Quadrant four years, nineteen days, eleven hours, and 38 minutes ago (not that I’m counting, Lt. Tuvok just happened to be passing by and he keeps up with stuff like that), I didn’t have a lot of faith in you.  In fact, there were a lot of people on the ship who thought you were crazy for destroying the alien array that brought us here.  And most a lot of us still view that move as one of your worst ideas.  But hey, you’re trained in Starfleet Captainry or whatever they call it, so I figured you knew what you were doing.

Now you did a great job of incorporating the Maquis into the fold here on the ship.  I mean, those guys were like super pissed at you.  And aside from the ones that didn’t get killed by space aliens or by our own security personnel for trying to overthrow the ship, the ones who jumped on the Voyager bandwagon have turned out pretty good.  So that is certainly a point in the black for you.  But I’ve been talking with 95%  most  a lot  some of the crew, and we have some demands suggestions for the rest of our voyage home.

Now I know you’re all on this Starfleet Federation kick of let’s explore while we are out here.  But seriously, isn’t most of space pretty much the same.  Couldn’t we maybe just drop off some solar powered recording probes and give them a push and let them find their way back to Earth?  Sort of like a reverse NASA space probe.  And hey, they even had a couple probes called Voyager 1 and Voyager 2.  I’ve talked to Neelix and he thinks this would be a great morale booster for the crew.  He suggested that we have a big christening and launch ceremony.  Voyager would live on for thousands of years as the probes make it back to Earth one by one.  And then we could make better time instead of stopping off at every planet along the way to investigate.

And since we are talking about it, what’s say we quit wandering off to investigate every new race that’s out there.  Sure they may have some sort of better, faster way home, but if they did, don’t you think they would have made it to the Alpha Quadrant and we’d already know about them and their faster-than-warp travel?  I mean, I asked Tuvok and he said that was “sound logic.”  And besides, Seven of Nine is working on Borgifying some stuff to get us home faster, so I don’t see why we have to make friends with everyone along the way.  It seems kinda like we are butting our noses in.  And besides, since those big alien hornets and that species that was kicking the Borg’s ass, everyone we’ve met has looked just like humans except they have weird ears or jacked up foreheads.  I think we can pass on by a lot of these civilized worlds and not lose a whole lot of anything.  Let’s face it, most of them are either at war with some other race, or they end up being jerks and trying to kill us like those dinosaur dudes when we told them they were dinosaurs.  And if they aren’t trying to kill us or someone else, they are just plain boring and are doing stuff like buttering their bread with rocks or collecting space trash to hock at some intergalactic flea market (no offense, Neelix).

Now this is probably the biggest ongoing issue.  There’s no real way to sugar-coat this one.  Kathy, you put this ship in danger a lot.  I mean A LOT!  Maybe we could ease up off of that.  There have been dozens of times we’ve had to repair this ship after sticking our phasers somewhere they didn’t belong.  I think it’s high time we just minded our own business.  Let’s continue this mission as if traveling through the Delta Quadrant is like driving through a really bad neighborhood at night (because if we are being honest here, that’s really what it has been like).  Let’s keep our heads down, keep our warp nacelles below the radar, and scurry on through as fast and inconspicuously as we can.

Those are just some suggestions.  If you’d like to talk about it, that’s cool.  I’m not really doing anything since I was confined to quarters after getting repeatedly caught spray painting human anatomy and smiley faces on the bulkheads.

Most cordially yours,
Fleet Admiral (really Acting Ensign but I dream big) BatDoc


A Fair and Balanced Look at Star Trek v. Star Wars

This debate has gone on long enough.  Which is better?  Who would win if they got into a fight?  Star Trek or Star Wars?  Well, like the great cases of Brown v. The Board of Education, Roe v. Wade, and Hustler Magazine v. Falwell, I’m going to follow in the footsteps of my hero William Rehnquist and give a fair and balanced look to end the debate once and for all of which is better, Star Trek or Star Wars.

In order to properly evaluate this, I’m breaking this down into several categories.  Whoever wins the category will get a point and whoever has the most points at the end wins.  So I guess this actually kind of follows in the footsteps of one of my other heroes, Peter Sagal, which makes this even more awesome.

Let’s start with manpower.  And let’s look at who the big players are in the manpower area.  In the Star Trek world, there’s the Klingons, the Romulans, the Cardassians, the Dominion, even the Maquis.  Basically a lot of warrior races.  In Star Wars, the biggest kid on the block is the Empire.  Everyone else in the Star Wars universe is small potatoes.  “But Doc, what about the Rebels?”  What about the Rebels?  Let’s be honest, the Rebels were more lucky than they were good at their job.  And Star Trek folks, don’t even mention the Federation.  They shouldn’t even bother showing up to this fight.  They can sit bench with the Rebels unless we need someone to hit a two-meter target or go back in time, grab a pair of humpback whales, bring them forward in time and hope the hell they tell a probe what to go do with itself.

So if we take this in the direction of an every-race-for-themselves open space battle, then I’m pretty sure the Borg win this one hands down.  They assimilate.  That’s it.  And they add technological and cultural distinctiveness to their own.  So if they assimilate clones, yeah, it’s not looking too good.  Or even worse, if they assimilated a Jedi or a Sith Lord!  Can you imagine that?!  Sure, I know what Star Wars fans are saying, “But, Doc, the Jedi and Sith derive their powers from a rooted belief system, not from technology or cultural cues.”  That’s great, but when we are talking about assimilating technology, they only have to assimilate one Jedi or Sith and now you’ve got a bunch of Borg drones wandering around with lightsabers.  If that doesn’t scare the ever-living crap out of you then you didn’t fully understood that last statement.

So while the Federation and the Rebels are warming the bench, let’s address the cute and fuzzy races as well.  Tribbles or Ewoks?  Sure the Ewoks have rudimentary weapons that can take down mildly-armored tanks on chicken legs.

Okay, hold on, I have to vent on something real quick.  Seriously, did no one in the Empire learn anything from the battle on Hoth?  Armored things precariously balanced on wobbly metal legs can clearly be easily tripped up.  Anyone who’s seen Robocop defeat ED-209 knows that.  If putting tanks on metal legs was a good idea, don’t you think some army in history would have done it by now?  I mean, the Nazis built all kinds of ill-manner of super weapons and no one was crazy enough to even put a tank on legs into production.  Seriously, Empire, take some notes from the Jawas and put all that armored assault technology on some tank tracks already!

Okay, venting over.  Thanks.  I needed that.  Now where was I?  Oh, yes, that’s right, Tribbles or Ewoks.  Let’s break this down.  The Ewoks live on Endor, a forest moon.  From what we learn in Original Star Trek Episode #44: The Trouble with Tribbles, Dr. McCoy explains how the Tribbles eat too much and reproduce way too fast.  They are “basically born pregnant” as Dr. McCoy describes it.  We also learned from Mr. Scott in the episode that the Tribbles worked their way into closed compartments and started eating parts of the ships systems.  That means dropping just one Tribble onto a forest moon would be like dropping a match into a barrel of gasoline-soaked dynamite.  Also according to the episode, Spock points out that Tribbles produce a new generation every 12 hours.  That means in just 3 days there would be a over 1.7 million Tribbles running around.  Now you’ve got the Ewoks that survive off of the forest, right?  That means these hungry Tribbles would eat them out of house and home in no time.  The Ewoks would literally starve to death or just be buried in Tribbles. Sure, 1.7 million Tribbles on one planet doesn’t seem like a lot.  But imagine this, in just 6 days, there would be over 34.5 trillion (yes, trillion with a T) Tribbles on Endor.  To give you an idea of how many that is, New York City has about 8.5 million people in the Five Boroughs.  That means that every single person in New York City would get over 4 million 58 thousand Tribbles.  Shanghi, China, which is the most populated city on Earth with just over 24 million people, each person would get over 1.4 million Tribbles.  The popular of the planet Earth is just over 7 billion, so that means everyone on Earth would get almost 5 thousand Tribbles each after just 6 days.  So yeah, good freakin’ luck, Ewoks.

Manpower: Star Trek – 1, Star Wars – 0

Now a military power is only as strong as the fleet they command.  And before we go any further, the difference between phaser and lasers and photon and proton torpedoes is nothing (Well, a little thing called worry-over-copyright-infringement if you want to get technical).  So when it comes down to weapons and defenses, all the big players who are in the starting line-up are on a pretty level playing field.  That means when we talk about fleets and military combat, the real discussion comes down to mobilization of forces.

The Empire wins this one hands down against anyone except the Borg (which we’ll get to in a minute).  The Empire is comparable to the American and Japanese Fleets in the Pacific Theater during World War II.  Nothing in the Star Trek universe even remotely resembles an aircraft carrier.  Star Destroyers are exactly that.  They are big space aircraft carriers with tons of TIE Fighters and Bombers and Interceptors and whatever other TIE things they have.  Federation, Romulan, Klingon, Ferengi, Andorian, Tholian, Cardassian, even the Dominion, none of them have anything close to being able to compete with that kind of firepower and maneuverability.  Even the Federation’s run-n-gun ship, the Defiant, couldn’t deal with so many targets at once.  And no one has any kind of massive fleet to deal with that kind of Imperial onslaught.  Any Star Trek fleet that would show up would get carved up by the death of a thousand TIE fighter lasers.

I know what you’re saying Star Trek folks, and I hear you loud and clear.  And you are right, the Rebels did pull a Billy Mitchell (if you don’t know who he is, look it up).  The Defiant might get lucky, but that’s about it.  And there’s still a lot of targets to deal with on a Star Destroyer with a full compliment of TIE whatevers.

Really the only race in Star Trek that can compete ship-to-ship is the Borg.  The Borg cubes at Wolf 359 were reported to measure about 3 kilometers across.  Star Destroyers measure 1600 meters, or right at a mile.  So one Borg cube is over twice as long as a single Star Destroyer.  In the Battle of Wolf 359, a single Borg cube destroyed 39 of the 40 Federation ships at the battle.  In the Star Trek: Voyager Episode Endgame, Seven of Nine tells Janeway that the transwarp hub nebula contained 47 Borg vessels.  And in the Star Trek: Voyager Episode Hope and Fear, the dude from Species 116 talks about hundreds of Borg cubes surrounding his homeworld before its destruction.  Not to mention the fact that Commander Shelby pointed out that a Borg cube could remain operative even if 78% of the cube was inoperable.  Then there are transporters, so not only would the Empire be trying to attack this Cube while they are getting carved up, but there are Borg beaming onto the ship and assimilating people too!  Actually, a Borg Cube going up against a couple of Star Destroyers would be a battle I’d love to see.

“But, Doc, what about the Death Star?”  Oh, you mean that big planet-sized space station that literally moves at the speed of a planet.  Borg got warp and transwarp.  The Death Star is boned.  All summed up, the Empire has the advantage over anyone except the Borg.  The Borg are here to party.  So since the Empire is the winner except with the Borg, I’m going to give both sides a point.

Strength of Fleet: Star Trek – 1, Star Wars – 1

Leadership is important in any space campaign.  And there are lots of great leaders on both sides.  But what makes a leader really great is not how nice or fair that leader is, but it’s about achieving results.  The Emperor, Darth Vader, Grand Moff Tarkin…Star Wars is full of people who get things done.  Sure they choke kill a lot of people along the way, but you gotta break some necks to make an omelet.  That makes the Empires efficiency rating just as high as its on-the-job fatality rating.  And then there are good leaders on the Rebel side as well.  And then you’ve got the Jedi as leaders too.  Star Wars has a pretty fair lineup in the leadership department.

Star Trek does pretty good as well, without as much ruthlessness.  Kirk, Picard, Sisko, Janeway, Archer…they all get things done by following the rules when they need to and forgetting the rules when necessary.  And it says a lot more about your leadership style if you are efficient and well-liked.

So I think leadership is a draw.  We could get into the particulars of each leader, but really each individual style has its good and bad qualities, so everyone gets a point here.

Leadership: Star Trek – 1, Star Wars – 1

Any science fiction series is only as good as the hot babes it has in it.  And I know Princess Leia in that metal bikini that they stole from Valerian and Laureline (don’t believe me, just type “Valerian and Laureline Metal Bikini” into Google images and let the George Lucas thievery begin) was the mainstay for a lot of young boys in their formative years of puberty.  But aside from Princess Leia, Padme Amidala, and Jabba’s three dancers (looking at you, fiery redhead), then you’ve got to go to the cartoons and extended universe to find other women.  Sure there is Ahsoka Tano (if you’re into jailbait), Mara Jade (if you’re into middle-aged girls), Aurra Sing (if you’re into criminals), Shaak Ti (if you’re into weird hair), and Asajj Ventress (if you’re into Sinead O’Conner).  But that’s not a lot of options.

Star Trek on the other hand is ripe with beautiful women who are ready to get down and party.  There’s Seven of Nine, Jadzia Dax (and Ezri too), Tonia Barrows, Robin Lefler, Tasha Yar (and her sister Ishara), Dr. Helen Noel,  Marta, Droxine, Kelinda, Kara, Ro Laren, B’elanna Torres, Kes, Beverly Crusher, Deanna Troi, Lt. Saavik, Android Andrea, Edith Keeler, Kamala, Lt. Valeris, Dr. Elizabeth Dehner, Leeta, Vash, Dr. Carol Marcus, Gannett Brooks, Bronwyn Gail Robinson, Amanda Cole, Martha Landon, Teresa Ross, Dr. Leah Brahms, Neras, Drusilla, Brenna Odell, Nona, Maras, Dr. Selar (Suzie Plakson), Tarah (also Suzie Plakson), K’Ehleyr (Suzie Plakson again), The Female Q (just any character of Suzie Plakson’s), Janice Rand, Shahna, Tora Ziyal, Eris, D’Nesh, Seska, Sela, Vina, Gilora Rejal, Deirdre Watley, Natima Lang, Grilka, Gul Ocett, Kilana, Uhura’s Orion Starfleet Academy roommate Gaila, and that three-boobed cat woman from Star Trek V.  And that’s just to name a few off the top of my head.  There’s tons more.  Literally every episode has a hot babe in it somewhere.  Star Trek seriously mops the floor with Star Wars in the female category.

Female to Male Ratio: Star Trek – 57+, Star Wars – 8.

Well, that puts Star Trek at 60+ and Star Wars at 10.  Looks like we’re pretty much done here.  I think William Rehnquist and Peter Sagal would be proud.


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