This week the Sci-Fried Eggs broadcast live from Geek Out in Asheville, NC! The Eggs talk with Charlie Caine’s Guide to Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse author Julianne Jackson and artist Stewart Williams. Then the Eggs chat with The Walking Dead zombie actor Wallace Krebs. And Doc and Chuck round out the show chatting with the inspirational author I.R. Harris!
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 110, Segment 1
Julianne Jackson and Stewart Williams Part 1
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 110, Segment 2
Julianne Jackson and Stewart Williams Part 2
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 110, Segment 3
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 110, Segment 4
I.R. Harris Part 1
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 110, Segment 5
I.R. Harris Part 2
This week the Sci-Fried Eggs broadcast from the Totally Retro ’80s Ski Weekend at Beech Mountain, NC! And since it is a trip back to the ’80s, the Sci-Fried Eggs bring you a Best of Show featuring some of their favorite guests from the ’80s, including interviews with the voice of April O’Neil Renae Jacobs, Child’s Play star Alex Vincent, mortal caretaker of the movie car Christine Bill Gibson, Jem and the Holograms nemesis Patricia Albrecht, and Back to the Future Delorean owners Terry and Oliver Holler!
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 95, Segment 1
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: Best of the ’80s/Renae Jacobs
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 95, Segment 2
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: Alex Vincent
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 95, Segment 3
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: Bill Gibson and Christine
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 95, Segment 4
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: Patricia Albrecht
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 95, Segment 5
Best of the Sci-Fried Eggs: Terry Holler and the Back to the Future Delorean
This week the Sci-Fried Eggs are back from the holidays and broadcasting from the Fitness Center at Bathurst Manor. The Eggs start by discussing some of the things that Back to the Future II promised us that we still don’t have. There’s some news about trips to Mars and Venus. Doc has a movie review of The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies and Chuck reviews In Your Eyes. 3D printing is making more waves. And the Eggs play another edition of Blind Movie Synopsis!
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 88, Segment 1
Back to the Future II 2015 Evaluation
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 88, Segment 2
Mars News and a Research Station on Venus
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 88, Segment 3
The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies and In Your Eyes Movie Reviews
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 88, Segment 4
3D Printing Advances
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 88, Segment 5
Blind Movie Synopsis #2: Black Butler, Fruits Basket, and Spice and Wolf
This week the Sci-Fried Eggs are on the road broadcasting from the Bathurst Manor Radio Production Unit Truck from HickoryCon II! Chuck is on special assignment, so Doc and Cher discuss Gotham and How to Get Away with Murder. Doc has some science anniversaries. Cher has another episode of Cher’s World of Weirdness. The Eggs ramble through the archives and bring you a previously un-aired interview with Cabin Fever actor William Jones. And Doc talks about some real fears of the impending zombie apocalypse.
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 74, Segment 1
Gotham and How to Get Away with Murder Reviews
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 74, Segment 2
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 74, Segment 3
Cher’s World of Weirdness #7
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 74, Segment 4
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 74, Segment 5
The Zombie Apocalypse is Real
This week the Sci-Fried Eggs are on the road broadcasting from the Bathurst Manor Radio Production Unit Truck from the Asheville Comic Expo. The Eggs start by giving everyone all the low down on Ghostbusters 3. Then Chuck reviews the iOS8 for iPhone. The Eggs talk about upcoming television and movie news. Doc has a new segment called Doc’s Documentary Corner. And the science community is seriously looking at traveling to Mars!
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 73, Segment 1
Everything We Know About Ghostbusters 3
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 73, Segment 2
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 73, Segment 3
TV and Movie News
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 73, Segment 4
Doc’s Documentary Corner: JFK: The Smoking Gun
Sci-Fried Eggs: Episode 73, Segment 5
Seriously Traveling to Mars
Dear Captain Janeway,
Well, when you got us stranded out here in the Delta Quadrant four years, nineteen days, eleven hours, and 38 minutes ago (not that I’m counting, Lt. Tuvok just happened to be passing by and he keeps up with stuff like that), I didn’t have a lot of faith in you. In fact, there were a lot of people on the ship who thought you were crazy for destroying the alien array that brought us here. And
most a lot of us still view that move as one of your worst ideas. But hey, you’re trained in Starfleet Captainry or whatever they call it, so I figured you knew what you were doing.
Now you did a great job of incorporating the Maquis into the fold here on the ship. I mean, those guys were like super pissed at you. And aside from the ones that didn’t get killed by space aliens or by our own security personnel for trying to overthrow the ship, the ones who jumped on the Voyager bandwagon have turned out pretty good. So that is certainly a point in the black for you. But I’ve been talking with
95% most a lot some of the crew, and we have some demands suggestions for the rest of our voyage home.
Now I know you’re all on this Starfleet Federation kick of let’s explore while we are out here. But seriously, isn’t most of space pretty much the same. Couldn’t we maybe just drop off some solar powered recording probes and give them a push and let them find their way back to Earth? Sort of like a reverse NASA space probe. And hey, they even had a couple probes called Voyager 1 and Voyager 2. I’ve talked to Neelix and he thinks this would be a great morale booster for the crew. He suggested that we have a big christening and launch ceremony. Voyager would live on for thousands of years as the probes make it back to Earth one by one. And then we could make better time instead of stopping off at every planet along the way to investigate.
And since we are talking about it, what’s say we quit wandering off to investigate every new race that’s out there. Sure they may have some sort of better, faster way home, but if they did, don’t you think they would have made it to the Alpha Quadrant and we’d already know about them and their faster-than-warp travel? I mean, I asked Tuvok and he said that was “sound logic.” And besides, Seven of Nine is working on Borgifying some stuff to get us home faster, so I don’t see why we have to make friends with everyone along the way. It seems kinda like we are butting our noses in. And besides, since those big alien hornets and that species that was kicking the Borg’s ass, everyone we’ve met has looked just like humans except they have weird ears or jacked up foreheads. I think we can pass on by a lot of these civilized worlds and not lose a whole lot of anything. Let’s face it, most of them are either at war with some other race, or they end up being jerks and trying to kill us like those dinosaur dudes when we told them they were dinosaurs. And if they aren’t trying to kill us or someone else, they are just plain boring and are doing stuff like buttering their bread with rocks or collecting space trash to hock at some intergalactic flea market (no offense, Neelix).
Now this is probably the biggest ongoing issue. There’s no real way to sugar-coat this one. Kathy, you put this ship in danger a lot. I mean A LOT! Maybe we could ease up off of that. There have been dozens of times we’ve had to repair this ship after sticking our phasers somewhere they didn’t belong. I think it’s high time we just minded our own business. Let’s continue this mission as if traveling through the Delta Quadrant is like driving through a really bad neighborhood at night (because if we are being honest here, that’s really what it has been like). Let’s keep our heads down, keep our warp nacelles below the radar, and scurry on through as fast and inconspicuously as we can.
Those are just some suggestions. If you’d like to talk about it, that’s cool. I’m not really doing anything since I was confined to quarters after getting repeatedly caught spray painting human anatomy and smiley faces on the bulkheads.
Most cordially yours,
Fleet Admiral (really Acting Ensign but I dream big) BatDoc
So my blood pressure is just fine but my cholesterol is a little high? Don’t those balance each other out? Oh, they don’t? Look, I’m not a doctor like you. I don’t know these things. Is this something I should be worried about? No? Then why are you even telling me? Just so I’ll know. Gotcha. Well, thank you for letting me know about it. What? One more question. Sure. Ask away, doc. Oh, where did I get all my scars? That’s a great question. I’m glad you asked. And, yeah, I suppose they are all pretty obvious when I’m sitting here naked. Speaking of which, can I tell you about them while I’m getting dressed? Don’t get me wrong, I like a good meat freezer, but you guys are overdoing it a little here. Seriously, your air-conditioning bill must be stupid expensive. But then again, I guess you probably never turn on the heat in the winter so it all balances out. Oh, right, my scars. Sure. Well, let’s see.
I guess let’s start with the most obviously ones on my forehead. The one on the left side of my forehead was when I stopped myself with the edge of a street sign while riding my bike down a steep grade. I know it sounds terrible, but you should’ve seen the street sign. That thing was bent all to hell. And bloody! Man, was it bloody. Your forehead bleeds A LOT! What am I saying, you’re a doctor. You probably already knew that. Bet they taught you that at John Hopscotch University or wherever you went to doctor school. It’s John what? Whatever.
Anyway, this other forehead scar I got from headbutting a Stormtrooper. Yeah, a Stormtrooper. Have you ever seen Star Wars? Yeah, you know those white guys? No, the guys with the laser swords are the Jedi. And they’re called lightsabers. Yeah, they do look like they’re dressed in bath robes. But the guys in the white armor, you remember them? Yeah, those guys are Stormtroopers. How did I meet them? No, I didn’t work on the movie. I was at this comic book convention and there were a bunch of people dressed up as Stormtroopers. Yeah, it’s apparently a big thing. They have this whole 700 Club they are in. So I said to one of them, “Aren’t you a little short for a Stormtrooper?” which is a line from the movie. Well, she didn’t think it was funny. Yeah, she. Yeah, girls dress up as guys all the time at comic book conventions. I don’t judge. Anyway, she sucker punched me in the side and I headbutted her as a natural reaction. Those plastic helmet crack pretty easily from a solid headbutt, but, interestingly enough, cracked plastic is apparently really sharp. And again, foreheads bleed a lot. Yeah, the helmet protected her pretty well, but I got this forehead scar and broke my nose. Broken noses bleed a lot too. But again, you’re a doctor, so you probably already knew that. No, she didn’t get in trouble. I got kicked out of the comic book convention for causing a ruckus. She felt bad about it. We ended up dating for a while until she got into Attack on Titan cosplay and posting on Reddit. Some people are into that kind of thing, but it was just too weird for me.
This scar on my elbow is probably my favorite. I was visiting New York City and I was riding the subway. I know, you have to ride the subway if you visit New York City. Anyway, as I was getting off the subway I got pushed down by Kevin Meaney. I landed on my elbow and broke it and ended up getting a compound fracture. The bone popped right out of my arm. It was totally gross. And Kevin kept right on going. Who’s Kevin Meaney? The guy who would always say “That’s not right!” Yeah, that guy! Oh, I don’t know what he’s doing now, but a few years ago he was pushing people around the subways near Tribeca.
This scar on my index finger is from when I dropped my lucky marble down the garbage disposal. This scar near my ankle is from a deer attack. The one across my lower back is from a dessert bar fight. This one on my left side is where I got shot with an arrow at Ren Faire. The one on the back of my left knee is from a patio furniture fire. The one on my chest is from a board game night accident. I’ve got one on the top of my head where I got hit with an inflatable raft. And the one on the side of my neck is from when I got my head stuck in a hay baler.
This scar here on my upper thigh is from one of my ex-wives. The scar just above my shoulder blade is from the same ex-wife. And so is this one on my left forearm. She was clearly a stabber. I eventually had to get a gun safe for all the knives in the house. And these three small scars near my shoulder, that’s where she stabbed me with a salad fork at The Cheesecake Factory. What? Oh, yeah, it didn’t work out. We got divorced. She’s actually went to prison for lunging at the judge and stabbing a deputy with a Bic Clic Stic pen during our divorce hearing. I think she got five years. But I got a letter from the court that she’s out on good behavior, which I seriously doubt. She probably slept her way out of prison. I don’t know. I guess it’s a thing. You can sleep your way up the corporate ladder, makes sense you could sleep your way out of prison too.
You’re right, doc, I probably am lucky to be alive. Makes that high cholesterol not seem so bad. What? Oh, yeah, my pinky toe. I lost that in a snow shoveling competition.
People love attention. And people love being the center of attention. I know first hand. I used to have a slightly better than moderately rated overnight radio show. And being the center of attention can be a wonderful thing. That’s why shows like American Idol and America’s Got Talent and America’s Funniest Videos do so well. It’s literally the reason Tom Bergeron still has a job. But for all you attention hogs out there (you know who you are), there are times when being the center of attention is not the thing you want at all. In fact, it is those times that being the center of attention is the worst thing that could possibly happen to you. Let me give you some examples.
• Court – That’s right. Unless you are getting paid to be there, court is not a place where you want to be the center of attention. The judge, the bailiff, the prosecuting attorney, the defense attorney, members of the jury, head juror, courtroom artist, stenographer, even the person who wins the case, you know what all those people have in common? That’s right! They’re all getting paid to be there. And if you’re the center of attention in a courtroom and you’re not drawing some kind of paycheck, then I can guarantee that’s bad news for you.
• Anything involving the cops – Let’s say you’re selling “merchandise” out of the back of your van in a “shady” neighborhood. And let’s say you’re “meeting your sales goals for the month.” You’re the center of attention with your particular brand of “clientele.” And you’re stackin’ smackers like a brick layer, so that’s the right kind of attention. But then the Five-0 rolls up on you and “da man” gets all up in your grill and starts damaging your cool. Your “clientele” all “run away like they done stole somethin’,” so you’re not making any money anymore. So now the “law-enforcement authorities” are on the scene and you’re the center of attention because of some misunderstanding about “fencing” goods. So this quickly turns into another situation where if you’re not on the clock, then you do not want to be the center of attention.
• Explosions – There’s no questions about it, explosions are awesome. Michael Bay and any eight-year-old kid can tell you that. Whether you are blowing up Barbie dolls or G.I. Joes (if you’re an eight-year-old kid) or cars, trucks, trains, ships, buildings, aliens, robots, alien robots, pyramids, tanks, battleships, small villages, large cities, space stations, and everything else that will and won’t blow up (if you’re Michael Bay), the point here is when that fiery concussion wave of rich, black smoke and smoldering debris erupts in that split-second of destructive heavenly bliss, if you’re not getting paid to make that explosion happen, you do not want to be the center of attention. So aside from building demolition crews, fireworks display coordinators, pyrotechnicians, military bombardiers, and certain chemists, being the center of attention after any kind of explosion is not going to fair well in your favor.
• Weddings – Unless you’re the bride, being the center of attention at a wedding is going to end up as a fist fight in a church parking lot or getting shived by the bride in a crowded reception hall. Trust me, I know about both of these. So unless you are getting paid to be at that wedding, say as the minister or the DJ, or the bride (let’s face it, having someone pay for your ridiculously expensive wedding is just like printing money), then you do not want to be the center of attention. And often, the bride shiving you is only the tip of that iceberg of trouble. Wait until her brother who was in the Marines finds out and demonstrates how he can break your car windshield with his bare fist and proves he can shove you into a trash can. And then her father who is an active member of the NRA shows you his impressive bullet collection by displaying them in the side of your powder blue Kia Sorento with the already busted windshield. When they say a wedding is a bride’s day, let her have that day and, for your own well being (and the well-being of your powder blue Kia Sorento), let her be the center of attention.
I could really go on and on with scenarios, instances, and times where you don’t want to be the center of attention, but what this really boils down to is, unless you are getting paid or compensated in some way, being the center of attention is bad news. So when you find yourself in a situation where you want to be the center of attention, just ask what you are getting out of it first, and if that answer is fame or fortune (or at the very least hourly minimum wage), then, by all means, be the center of attention like a boss.
♠ The title for this essay is courtesy of Brandon Echols. If you have an essay title you’d like to suggest, email it to BatDocBlog@gmail.com. You might see your essay title in one of my books, and I’ll be sure to thank you in the book for it!